So the National Spelling Bee is taking place now. How lame is this thing? Spelling is a negligible (is that word spelled right?) talent, some people can and some people can't. But the words these kids spell, I, and most other people, have never heard of and they're never used in common speech either. I'd like to know if these kids truly understand the meaning of the words they're spelling. They spend about 10 minutes per word too, asking for the definition, the root language, different pronounciations, writing it with their finger on their board, and repeating the word a million times. What the heck?? You either know it or you don't, so just spit it out!

And these are the homeliest kids. Many are home schoolers that sit around and practice spelling all day, just about all seem to lack any kind of social skills whatsoever. To reiterate, these are the HOMELIEST kids I've ever seen.

And why is this competition on ESPN? It's not a sport! Well, maybe a mind sport, but it seems to clash with the usual baseball/football of that channel. It doesn't exactly reach the same audience as redneck, beer-drinking, football fans now does it?

And where's the moderator with the big lips and thick glasses that they usually have?? He's gone! He was the most bored looking guy I've ever seen (of course, I would be too). The assoicate guy got a promotion, but he looks equally as bored. But half the reason I tuned in was to see that guy! Gosh darn it...

Basically, these kids (and their parents) live or die by how they do in the Spelling Bee, and my thought is: WHO CARES?? Just use the spell check on your computer and forget about knowing how to spell words like 'saltimbocca'!

CLAY, CHILL DAWG!

My brother and I think that Clay Aiken is bitter about losing the American Idol title. I saw an interview with him on a newschannel, and he was like, (I'm not quoting exactly here) "My friends were calling for the first half-hour but couldn't get through so they gave up. I said, 'But you could've gotten a good three or four votes in in that time!' " Dude, give it up--you LOST! Don't harp on the fact you lost, or that the votes should be recounted, or any of that junk. It's OVER. I think he got the best deal of it anyway because he was given a record contract too, even for being in second place, and he doesn't have quite the level of mass hysteria surrounding him than Ruben, the winner does. So my advice is: Chill dawg!

And while I'm on the subject, does anyone seriously think that American Juniors is a good idea?? This is LAME. If there's one thing I don't like to see, it's kids singing. They haven't fully matured yet for God's sake! The guys voices will be cracking all over the place! Plus, the age old adage applies here: Kids are only cute until they grow up to become adolescents. (or is that cats?) Anybody remember Kris Kross? Cute kid rappers turned deep-voiced thugs. Nobody ever learns...

TRUE HOLLYWOOD STORY LAMENESS

Speaking of the E! True Hollywood Story, as I was in my last post, the worst thing that can happen to you is to actually be interviewed for your own True Hollywood Story. I cite Corey Haim, who, in true jobber fashion, explained every facet of his life/career, including his failed marriages and drug problems. This is so lame. Why would you willingly participate in a program that is sure to dig up the sordid details of your life, and actually add your own viewpoint to it? My answer: Corey Haim wants to be on TV so bad because he needs to get his face in the public eye once again and the direct-to-video GUNK that he acts in just ain't cuttin' it. Let's be honest--haven't we all missed Corey Haim's smiling visage? *snicker*

THE BATEMANS

Right now I'm watching the Justine Bateman E! True Hollywood Story. But this begs the question, where's the Jason Bateman True Hollywood Story? Isn't he equally as jobber-rific as his sister? I cite Teen Wolf Too, need I say more? His career died after that, if he ever had a career in the first place. The first Teen Wolf featured basketball as its sport, and what did its sequel feature as its sport? BOXING. Boxing?! You've gotta be kidding me! How many colleges have boxing as a spectator sport, and how many of those draw in huge crowds to their boxing matches?? That was the dumbest idea ever. I could've made Teen Wolf Too much better. For starters, I would've made the sport football, which actually does draw crowds, and you could've done the exact same story based on that, but nooooooo, somebody has a boxing fetish! Because of the flop sequel and the fact that 80s-type movies don't sell anymore, my feeling is we'll never see another Teen Wolf movie again, so that renders my idea dead in the water. *sigh*